I'm a girl who loves a good to-do list, but lately, that obsession has teetered into an unhealthy relationship. I find I can't relax until my lists are completely crossed off, and let's face it: when has that ever happened?
So this weekend, I made a point of embracing the undone. I made lists of everything that needs to get done in the month of June: household projects to complete before my in-laws visit in July; rooms that need to be cleaned; errands that need to be run; calls that need to be made.
From those lists, I pulled out the items with hard and fast deadlines: two reviews due today.
Then I put the rest of the lists in a drawer and sat down on the couch to watch Outlander.
It was uncomfortable at first; I actually went upstairs to get a basket of unfolded laundry to fold while watching the show. But after the laundry was folded, I just sat. And watched. And sat. And watched. And sat. And the longer I sat, the more comfortable I became with just being there, doing nothing but watching my show.
And the world didn't end.
And the house didn't fall down.
And I was ok.
I even slept better than I have in weeks.
I tried it again today: those lists are still tucked inside a drawer, and I won't pull them out again until tomorrow. Sure, I made coffee and went to the farmer's market and wrote my two reviews with hard and fast deadlines, but I also curled up in the sun-soaked reading nook my husband built and read an entire novel cover-to-cover and took a nap. I wrote a letter to a friend. I made myself a sandwich.
"Nap", "call a friend," "read a book": these are not to-dos that often end up on my lists. But that doesn't mean they are things that don't need to be done. Only be embracing the undone was I able to realize how much I truly had left to do--only this list doesn't feel daunting.